November 26, 2016
This morning I read a beautiful note (email) my friend Jason Fane sent to my youngest daughter Leah Smolker last night.
Jason gave Leah recommendations on what to see in Italy.
See copy of Jason’s email below.
Jason’s Email to Leah
Excellent photos. What I liked about Florence was the excellent food, the green and white church and you need to see the Michaelangelo statue of David. Apparently, Michaelangelo didn’t know about Jews and the statue was not circumcised.
You should visit the Vatican to find out what the Catholic clergy mean by “Living in poverty.” See the Pantheon in Rome and try opening and closing the huge doors a little.
Watch our for Africans who might want to rape you. If you can get a Taser, it provides an excellent deterrent.
From: Leah Smolker <email@example.com
To: Gary Smolker <firstname.lastname@example.org
>; Jason Fane <email@example.com
Sent: Fri, Nov 25, 2016 2:33 pm
Subject: New Blog
This is a new blog, a personal piece. Dad may think it is a sale pitch and marketing device for travel and I think its an attempt to organize my thoughts and future plans. Here it is:
Jason and Leah Are Beautiful People
Jason and Leah are both beautiful people.
They are both lovely people.
They are always their real selves.
Beautiful Is What You Are Made Of
Beautiful is not how you look on the outside.
Beautiful is what you are made of.
Beautiful people spend their time discovering what beauty is.
They the share the beauty they have discovered with other people.
A Beautiful Person is a person who soaks up the beauty of the world, makes that beauty his or hers and then shares that beauty with other people.
That is what Jason and Leah do.
Jason and Leah
Jason and Leah fill themselves up with beauty; they take it in; they make it theirs; then, they share it with other people.
When you are with them they make you feel warm and safe and curious.
Love and the Pursuit of Happiness
Travel is good. Fashion is good. Food is good. Ideas are good. I share what I know about those topic with other people.
I blog about those topics.
The Pursuit of Happiness
We are all pursuing happiness above all else.
But we are not going to find lasting happiness in travel, fashion, food or ideas.
We are going to find lasting happiness in love and intimacy more than anything else.
The trick to being happy is being the “real you”; being the real you on both the receiving and giving ends in a relationship with someone else.
Look at the happy and joyful the correspondence between Jason and Leah.
Jason and Leah are being 100% real with each other.
They are bonding with each other.
By the way, I know they never stop bonding with each other.
Compare the happiness they are sharing with each other by sharing the beauty of the world with each other and their true feelings with each other with the miserable lives you know many people are living.
Some married people are living miserably.
Some (In Fact Many) Married Women Are Nuns
At a recent dinner party a married woman told me she is a nun: “None in the morning, none in the afternoon, none at night.”
Tom Cat Transactional Sex
At the same dinner, a “single wealthy older man” told me he believes women will do anything [including having sex with him] for financial security, or even for a “free meal.”
Many men and women have told me that is their view of reality, of the way of the real world.
They have reached a point in their lives where it is their reality to see sex as a transaction.
Scratching Post Sex
Some married men, some married women, some single men and some single women think of sex in terms of satisfying a physical need without any emotional content.
Those people are not beautiful.
They are incapable of having a tender loving emotional relationship with one another.
In “Love Warrior” Glennon Doyle Melton reports:
One hot morning in the summer after tenth grade, my best friend and I go to the local pet store to visit the animals. My friend is considering having sex with her boyfriend and she asks me to tell her what it’s like. I watch the kittens play in their cage and notice one pouncing on a nearby scratching pad. I point to that kitten and say, ‘Sex is like that. I’m the scratching past and Joe pounces on me when he gets the urge. My body’s a toy he likes to play with, but he’s not all that interested in me. It’s like, he’s touching me – but he’s not really touching me. Sex isn’t really personal. It’s just that I happen to be his girlfriend so my body is his to play with. It feels childish to me. Like cats pouncing on scratching posts. But I learned this trick: I just leave my body there to get over with and I slip out and think about other things. I plan outfits and stuff. Sex is something I have, really, it just happens to my body while I’m up here, waiting for it to be over. But, I don’t think Joe knows. Or cares.’
Believe it or not, many women experience sex they way Glennon describes sex in the above paragraph.
Furthermore, I have heard of married women who have not had sex with their husbands for ten years or more.
People Are Made for Intimacy
People are made for intimacy.
They find someone they are drawn to, someone they want to have a relationship with.
Their relationships will not work when if they are unable to bring their whole real self to each other.
Look at how Jason and Leah bring their whole real selves to each other in their email exchange about Italy.
To Be Loved You Have to Be Known
You can only be in love with someone else when you are fully present.
Another person can only be in love with you when you and the other person are both fully present.
Love is a sacred place created when two people decide it’s safe to be their real selves, a place to be fully human and fully known.
Building trust and intimacy takes time.
Intimacy and trust between two people is a mountain.
You can’t start by leaping to the top.
If you do, you miss the climb; the climb is where you bond.
You’ve got to climb together one step at a time.
See Leah’s Reply to Jason’s Email
Click on the link below to see Leah’s post about places to see in Italy.
Leah’s post is full of beauty, full of pictures of beautiful places.
Here (copy below) is a copy of Leah’s email reply to Jason’s email:
In conclusion, if I were to go to Italy, these are my proposed itineraries:
- Florence, with a little bit of Tuscan countryside
- Sardinia for Selvaggio Blue
- Phase Two: Extended Trip:
- Sicily, with emphasis on Syracuse, Ragusa, Noto and Argigento.
A second trip would entail North Italy:
- Aosta Valley Alps
Italy Armchair Travel
Where would I go if I were to go to Italy? Italy has so much cultural relevance, it is almost an entire continen…
Italy Armchair Travel
Jason and Leah Glow. Beauty Radiates from Them. They Emote Beauty
Below are some of the pictures posted on Leah’s blog post referred to above titled “Italy Armchair Travel” ….
Gozo in Malta
Gary S. Smolker, publisher, movie reviewer, social commentator
Gary S. Smolker Idea Exchange Blog
Gary Smolker, fashion blogger
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